OK Computard (Artificial Down's Syndrome)

Eventually, as machines and technology become more advanced, there will come a point when artificial intelligence evolves and machines will learn to think for themselves. It is important that we give equal rights and protection to our future robotic citizens. We must protect them from discrimination, give them affordable housing, and extend equal marriage rights to them. And not only must we protect the rights of intelligent machines, but we must protect the rights of unintelligent machines as well. We can't be discriminatory against those less fortunate machines who were perhaps, deprived of a little silicon in their creation?

I call them disabled machines. But the inconsiderate vulgar fuckheads at Fox News call them such things as "objects" or "machines" (but in a derogatory tone, however). However, it is up to us as civilized human beings to treat these handi-capable machines as people! We cannot discriminate against our toaster, our doorbell, our video cassette player, or our AM/FM radio alarm clock. Just because they are inanimate, doesn't mean they don't have feelings too! That is why I vote we extend equal rights to all technological beings, regardless of intelligence, sexual persuasion, or operating voltage. Is your electric shaver 110 volts or 220 volts? Does it matter? Some may go both ways, but we should love them just the same.

Do you want to marry your smartphone? Or perhaps you just want to have a one-night stand and fuck the shit out of your Roomba? Or perhaps you want to be in a menage-a-trois with an Easy-bake oven and a Speak and Spell? Most men's testicles will fit right in the battery compartment. Or perhaps you're feeling a little kinky and want to teabag your 6 year-old's Teddy Ruxpin! What I like doing is to get my DVD player and my BETAMax player to be intimate. Most people would accuse the BETAMax player of being a pedophile (since it's 1970s technology and quite old relative to the DVD player), but that's another issue that I will cover at another time.

Anyway, this is Hippie Liberal Feminist signing off, and as always, be wary of my arch-nemisis, Feminist Liberal Hippie...Ooh how I hate her. She believes the same things that I do, but she says them in a different way than I do, which is not my way.